He Rang the Bell without Hands

HUSBAND WANTED
A lonely woman, aged 70, decided that it was time to.get married. She put an ad in the local paper that read:
HUSBAND WANTED!
MUST BE IN MY AGE GROUP (70′s),
MUST NOT BEAT ME,
MUST NOT RUN AROUND ON ME,
AND MUST STILL BE GOOD IN BED!
ALL APPLICANTS PLEASE APPLY IN PERSON.
On the second day she heard the doorbell. Much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a gray- haired gentleman with no arms orlegs sitting in a wheelchair.
The old woman said, “You’re not really asking me to consider you, are you? Just look at you… you have no legs!” The old man smiled,”Therefore I cannot run around on you!”
She snorted. “You don’t have any hands either!”
Again the old man smiled, “Nor can I beat you!”
She raised an eyebrow and gazed intently.”Are you still good in bed?” With that, the old gentleman leaned back, beamed a big broad smile and said, “I rang the doorbell, didn’t I?”

How To Play On Indian Pitches!

Only Shoaib Malik Knows How To Play On Indian Pitches!
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Kabi Poggo Be Dekh Liya Kro =D

4 advantages of breast milk

A student who had not studied was writing
his final exam for life science. The question
he couldn’t answer: “Give 4 advantages of
breast milk.”
What to write? He sighed & began to
scribble:
1. No need to boil.
2. Cats can’t steal it.
3. Available whenever necessary.
One more, what to write? He frowned.
Then he triumphantly scribbled his final
answer:
4. Available in attractive containers.

Do you watch your husband face

Doctor: do you watch your husband face during sex?

Lady: I did once and he looked very angry.

Doctor: why?

Lady: because he was watching from the window.

A Brunette, Redhead and a Blonde

One day a brunette, a redhead and a blonde decide to go through their daughter’s purses.

So, the brunette goes through her daughter’s purse and finds cigarettes. She says, “Oh my god, I’m so ashamed! My Daughter smokes.”

So, the redhead goes through her daughter’s purse and finds an empty can of beer. She says, “Oh my god I’m so ashamed! My daughter drinks.”

So, finally, it’s the blondes turn and she finds a used condom. She says, “Oh my god I’m so ashamed! My daughter has a penis.”

A Grandmother and a Girl

There was a virgin that was going out on a date for the first time and
she told her grandmother about it.
Her grandmother says, “Sit here and let me tell you about those young
boys. “He is going to try to kiss you; you are going to like that, but
don’t let him do that.”
She continued, “He is going to try to feel your breast; you are going
to like that, but don’t let him do that. He is going to try to put his
hand between your legs; you are going to like that, but don’t let him
do that.
Then the grandmother said, “But, most importantly, he is going to try
to get on top of you and have his way with you. You are going to like
that, but don’t let him do that. It will disgrace the family.”
With that bit of advice in mind, the granddaughter went on her date
and could not wait to tell her grandmother about it.
The next day she told her grandmother that her date went just as the
old lady said.
She said, “Grandmother, I didn’t let him disgrace the family. When he
tried, I turned him over, got on top of him and disgraced his family.

Santa ne cooking contest main part lia aur

Santa ne cooking contest main part lia aur khali bartan main spoon firane laga.

JUDGE: Kya bana rahe ho?

Santa: “Chutiya”
=)) :p
=)) X_X..

Farq Talash Karney Waley ko.

-(‘.’)- -(‘.’)-

_/”‘\_ _/’!'\_
Farq Talash Karney Waley ko.
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“FARQ”
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‘INAAM’ Me Diya Jaega… :D
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

WHY Could Ayesha takiya never become a School Teacher?

Hilarious 18+ joke .. ;)
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WHY Could Ayesha takiya never become a School Teacher..?
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….
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B’coz Everytime She moved to Write something on a Board The Words got Rubbed Without a Duster…

jise jise samja thoko like baki bachon k liye ma next post m poggo ka link send kr donga *** ;) :O

A Mosquito enters the girl’s skirt

Girl friend & boy friend go for a movie.
In the dark, a mosquito enters the girl’s skirt.
Guess where it would have bitten?
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The boy’s hand. ;)

Kids Grow Up tooo Damn Fast

16 & Preqnant
15 & Fucking
14 & Sucking
13 & Licking
12 & Fingering
11 & Rubbing
10 & Touching
9 & Dry Humping
8 & Kissing
7 & Wondering …

Smfh , Kids Grow Up tooo Damn Fast..

But why are you crying

Tom came crying…

Dad : What happened.?
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Tom : today at class when we got up from our seats for prayers, Roselyn, who sits in front of us, had her skirt stuck between her bum. Seeing that my benchmate pulled it out.
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Dad : thats bad. But why are you crying.?
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Tom : I know thats bad, so I pushed it back into her bum and she slapped me!

Veena’s Nude Photo Is Fake

Veena’s Nude Photo Is Fake.
Veena Malik Doesn’t Look Like This Without Clothes.

-Rehman Malik
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Pedaishi Jhoota Hai Saala, Bilkul Asli Hai,
Main Ne Khud Dekha Hai..

-Zulfiqar Mirza

=D hahaha

Why Do You Hide When You Are Having Sex

A Dog Asked A Cat:
“Why Do You Hide When You Are Having Sex?”

Cat Replied:
“Cause we don’t Want Humans to Copy Our Style, They’ve Already Copied Yours“ :p

Dear Santa, please send me a baby brother!

Child: “Dear Santa, please send me a baby brother!”
Santa: “Send me your mother.” ;)

Dear Santa, please send me a baby brother!

Child: “Dear Santa, please send me a baby brother!”
Santa: “Send me your mother.” ;)

Crazy Family

Daughter: Dad, I’m a lesbian.
Dad: It’s cool.
Second daughter: Dad, I’m
also a lesbian.
Dad: Christ! Does anyone in
this family like cock?!
Son: I do!

We must not be afraid of

we must not be afraid of
11.11.11 or
12.12.12
because nothing can beat….
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36.24.36
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jin ko samjh aye hay woh like karin…
or jin ko nai aye woh Cartoon Network daikhien….

There are 4 ways to enjoy love

There are 4 ways to enjoy love,

1. Hand in Hand.
2. That in hand.
3. Hand in that.
4. That in that.

hahaha xD :P

Be Gentle please Its My 1st time on BED

WIFE: Be Gentle please Its My 1st time on BED

HUSBAND: What..! But you have been “Divorced Thrice”

WIFE: Yes…! But My First Husband was a “Philosopher” He only talked about it…

2nd was “Gynecologist” He just kept looking at it…!

3rd was “Engineer” He needed a year to design a new way to do it…!

AND YOU are a “Politician” so this time
I know I am going to be “FU-KED” Like My Country.